you know, sometimes i really enjoy tutoring my favourite tuition kid. cos i get to mess around with his mind and irritate the hell out of him.

like i’ll throw some suspense and he’ll be all confused to whether his maths solutions are correct. or he’ll be concentrating on his maths questions and i’ll go “kaaaarang guneeeeeee. siu poh zua gu sar kor, radio video dian si kee” when i hear the rag-and-bone man touting his horn downstairs.

i think of new ways to drive him crazy every lesson and i get a kick of out it.

yesterday i suffered retribution. he asked me some maths problem with you know, those that asks you how many chickens are there among a total of 160 cow legs and chicken legs, when the ratio of chickens to cows is 3:4.

while i was coming up with a quick solution mentally, he kept hounding me about the reward i owe me and chattered on and on.

i got so messed up mentally, i declared, “a cow has two legs and a chicken has four legs!”

and towards the end of the lesson, he asked me to check through a problem he had supposedly solved. that was the kind of problem sum with just one question on an entire page, worth five marks. so you know, that usually requires quite a number of steps.

he passed me a blank page with just the answer blank filled in with the supposedly correct answer. i was so astounded with his intelligence i forgot my role as a politically correct tutor and exclaimed, “WAH LAU EH! why no working one!”

sometimes i really think i should stop polluting the young innocent minds of the next generation in case they grow up to be like me.